How do you teach self-reliance to someone you do everything for? From their preparing food to paying their bills, you do it all for your kids. One of the most important responsibilities of a parent is to bring up kids that can fend for themselves. The key is to holding them close yet allowing them to move. There is a tendency for some parents to conflate loving kids with spoon-feeding them. Parenting is an area of life where there are many possibilities and way of doing things, as long as you’re getting results.
Here are some ways we think you can raise independent kids:
1. Let them make mistakes.
Not making mistakes is the biggest mistake one can make. Let your children go through the fall on their own so they can rise without your help. Maintain a balance between being a supportive guardian and allowing the space to make mistakes they can learn from. Let them forget their lunch one day. Going through a day on an empty stomach may not be comfortable but it will force your kid to ensure he doesn’t step out of the door without checking certain boxes.
2. Teach them life skills.
There is no better way of paving a path of self-reliance than teaching your kids life skills necessary to thrive in this day and age. Regardless of how old your kid is, you can help them develop various skills. Teach your kid how to think critically and delve deep into each topic they learn. Foster their creativity and encourage them to learn the liberal arts – most importantly, language and grammar. Both girls and boys must also learn how to prepare well-balanced meals, clean their rooms and do laundry.
3. Learn to say no.
If you’re a seasoned parent, you will know how to say without saying “No!” There are many other ways of deterring kids from doing something harmful. One way is to simply explain why something may be bad for them or by letting them know that there is a better way of doing something. If do something incorrectly, show them how it’s done right. Give them facts as to why what they’re doing is not right or why they can’t have what they’re asking for. This way, they are well-informed and won’t ask for the same thing again.
4. Create a safe and supportive learning environment.
Parents, due to their intense love for their kids, oftentimes do everything for their kids to make their lives comfortable. They fail to see that each time they perform a task for their kids, they’re robbing them of a learning opportunity. In a lot of ways, one evolves into an effective parent over time. There are lessons to be learned at every stage but it’s important to remember that your job is not to do everything for your kid but to teach them how to get things done on their own. You can’t always be around for your kids to fall back on. Allow the time they spend in your loving presence to be one of learning and exploration.