Bullying: What to look out for
As parents, particularly of young boys, the chance of your child becoming a victim of bullying is always at the back of our minds. It is a sad realization that you may have to deal with this, especially as adolescence approaches. Bullying can arise because a child is different from his/her peers, perhaps because of a physical disability. It can also arise from something as small as a hairstyle. Bullying affects all races, sex and nationalities. It is a major epidemic and leaves both parents and kids worried, anxious and afraid.
However, often the warning signs are there, but because of our busy lives, we often miss them and put them down to something else such as exam stress or not making the football team.
How can we recognise these signs? Let’s take a look.
- Your child has lost his/her appetite
- He/she is moody and withdrawn
- Spends a lot of time alone
- Doesn’t enjoy social activities
- Is more tearful than usual
- School grades drop
- Sleeps a lot
- Seems angry
- Doesn’t want to go to school
- Speaks about running away
- Has unexplained physical marks, cuts or bruises
- Comes home with damaged property
- Unexplained strange behaviour
- Weight loss
Kids are often extremely embarrassed about being bullied so parents need to find subtle ways to approach the subject. Giving gentle reassurance that you are there for them and they can tell you anything is important. Don’t come on too strongly as they will withdraw. If you notice, for example a bruise or that a toy (device) is missing, ask about it casually. Asking yes or no questions will help in getting a better idea of what is going on.
After all is said and done, you know your child best. Watch them closely, even when they are silent as body language gives important clues too. Walking with drooping shoulders and looking down speaks volumes. He/she is carrying the proverbial weight of the world.
Early detection is vital and can save a lot of families from immense pain and suffering, allowing intervention to begin immediately.