What Team Sports Can Teach Us About Relationships

Of what can make or break a relationship, a lot is to be learned from great team sports like baseball or soccer. The analogies are all there. Consider the “ball hog”: the one who thinks they’re so good, they’d rather try and win as a team of one, shouldering all responsibility while alienating teammates. Other players have the opposite problem—they have trouble seeing when the perfect shot is theirs for the taking, or pass the ball instead of going for it even when they’re in the better position to score. Their insecurities get the better of them, limiting their potential contributions to the team.

Each type of player shares a similar problem, even if they come at it from opposite angles: they’re more concerned with themselves than the team. The “ball hog” wants to win at all costs, and, let’s be honest, probably doubts the abilities of others compared to his or her own. He or she is overly frustrated by others’ mistakes and undermines team morale. The “hesitator,” on the other hand is unduly deferent. That can represent its own form of selfishness by trying to avoid the embarrassment of missing a shot or losing face in the eyes of their teammates.

The best teams are made up of neither ball hogs nor hesitators but team players who want to be the best they can be as individuals while also playing to the strengths of their teammates. They build each other up instead of tearing each other down.

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